Let’s chat about gaslighting in a way that’s easy to get, so we can understand and handle our relationships better.
1. They tell blatant lies
If you catch your partner spinning tales like a fiction novelist, it might be a sign of gaslighting. Little white lies are one thing, but when the stories start sounding more like a Hollywood script than reality, it’s time to raise an eyebrow. Trust your gut; if the facts don’t add up, it’s okay to question what you’re being told.
2. They undermine your emotions to invalidate your reality
Ever poured your heart out about something that hurt or bothered you, only to have your partner brush it off like yesterday’s news? Gaslighters are pros at making your emotions seem insignificant. If your feelings are consistently downplayed or dismissed, it’s like they’re telling you your reality doesn’t matter. Spoiler alert: it does.
3. They use confusion as a weapon
Gaslighters are masters of creating chaos. If your conversations feel like a maze with no exit, where you’re constantly second-guessing what’s real, you might be caught in the web of gaslighting. Clear communication should be straightforward, not a puzzle to solve. Trust your instincts and seek clarity when things seem intentionally murky.
4. They withhold affection as a form of punishment
Affection should be given freely, not used as a bargaining chip. If your partner turns into a cold, distant statue whenever there’s a disagreement, it’s a classic gaslighting tactic. Healthy relationships involve communication and understanding, not emotional withdrawal. Don’t let love become a tool for control.
5. They label you as “overly sensitive,” “hysterical,” or “too emotional”
When you’re called “too sensitive” more times than you’ve had hot dinners, it’s a red flag. Gaslighters often play the emotional judo card, making you question the validity of your feelings. Newsflash: emotions are valid. If someone’s constantly making you feel like you’re on an emotional rollercoaster, it might be time to step off.
6. They attack the people, things, and values that are most dear to you
Picture this: you share your love for vintage vinyl records, and suddenly your partner’s trashing your favorite Bowie album. Gaslighters aim for the jugular, attacking what matters most to you. It’s not just about disagreeing; it’s a strategic move to destabilize your sense of self. Protect what you hold dear and question anyone trying to tear it down.
7. They make you doubt your sanity
Gaslighting often involves subtle tactics that leave you questioning your own sanity. If your partner insists that your perceptions are skewed or that you’re losing your grip on reality, it’s a red flag. Trust in your mental clarity, and don’t let anyone convince you that you’re going crazy just because they want to maintain control.
